Warm Beach Camp 2010

"Light of the world
You stepped down into darkness.
Opened my eyes, let me see.
Beauty that made this heart adore You
Hope of a life spent with You

Here I am to worship,
Here I am to bow down,
Here I am to say that You're my God
You're altogether lovely
All together worthy,
All together wonderful to me..."

Beautiful days at camp, I wish I could go back.
Tears fill the cup that show the despair that I had,
and poured out,
gone forever.
Now, a new day He has created for me
I am new.


Hearts and Tye Dye

My youth group for church is filled with some awesome people. The youth pastor is incredible, guess what we did for camp? (Let me give you a hint: it's yellow, pink, and awesome all over.)
I can't wait for camp, it's the best part of my year. We're separated from the world and put in touch with the most important person in someone's life: Jesus Christ.
God, I love You so much.
But, this means I'll be gone for a week. But that's okay, I'll post lotso' pictures. ;)
speak to me, oh God
your voice has never been more needed
a cool relaxed breeze
on my dry dessert heart
wash over me,
dip me into the blood 
that you have given
and let me not possess
an Achilles heel
because I would feel
a failure to you.
I love you.
Because you first loved me. ♥


Floral Dress 2010

Today I woke up with reason not to feel too hot, if you know what I mean. But depite that, I felt as if today were the day to dress up, because I haven't had a good vintage day in a good long time.
I found a floral sheet in the closet and a perfect place in my room for a little photo-op. ;) Isn't God good for the little miracles he gives?
I love this. For a few more photos visit my new flickr, it's called rapid_shoes.
Love you all. ♥



Beauty and the Beast

I have to tell you that my favorite movie in the world is Beauty and the Beast, and I am particularly partial to the Disney version. The first scene--the prologue-- captured my heart when I beheld it at a tender age of 4. It lays true in my heart! ♥
But I must tell you, this classic version has found a way to sprinkle fairy dust and love over my heart as well. La Belle et La Bete is a film directed by Jean Cocteau and spins twirls of beauty in black and white. It's actually very similar to a book that I have read named Beauty by Robin McKinley, in which Belle's father goes into the Beast's castle and is eventually threatened death for taking one of the Beast's beloved roses.
I really recommend seeing this film, it is beautiful, a bit dark, yet amazing. To be honest, I have not finished it yet! But I can tell this is going to be love.  ♥

Something to Keep Me Busy

I am... an amateur at life. But a lover, also.
I know...how to make my friends smile.
I love it when...this special someone smiles.
I am known for...having a ton of personality.
The nickname I'm embarrassed of is... little girl.
People think I am a little... period. I am small.
I wish I never... met him.
My friends wish... we could hang out more?
My favorite place to shop is...the Value Village in Kirland.
My favorite place to hang out is... at school with all my friends.
My favorite band is... Progress in Color.
Last time I got in trouble... was when I was in over my head.
My family... is beautiful.
If you met my Uncle... you would say we all look alike.
I get embarassed when... someone points out my past mistakes.
I want to get married... to an amazing, beautiful, special, romantic, smart, and crrrazy man.
My favorite food is... either Chinese, Mexican, or soul food.
I would like to have.... a little more confidence!
I don't mind sharing... advice from me to you.
If I won the lottery I would...donate a good portion, and give a good portion to my family.
I think Obama is ... trying to fix this sh*t!
I love it when people...hug me.
I've learned that... people will dislike you for silly reasons.
People love me because...I don't sound arrogant like this! Ha!
I would kill someone if... (I don't know if I would!)
I think God...is the most amazing person in my life.
I wish I would have never...let him go.
When I am mad...I yell.
When I am sad...I wallow in self pity.
I think I am good looking because...I don't wear so much makeup. Natural beauty.
My best friend... is lovely.
When I die...I am going to Heaven. :)
What I love most is...my God.
My life is...not perfect, but trying to be a better person is heading it that way.
I think the world would be a better place if... people were not selfish.
If I could change... the world.
I gag when I think of... blue waffle.
I need a... boyfriend! Hahaha.
My favorite tv show is...Gilmore Girls/Degrassi (as of now!)
My favorite Movie is...Beauty and the Beast.
I dont deserve...God's mercy.
I wish I could make money...piutting together outfits for people to wear.
My job... is to love.
School is... where I perform my job.
I think the goverment should... never let me in office.
If more people thought like me the world would... be out of its mind.
The best year of my life...2010!
I miss... Matt.
I think the war... is a dreadful thing.
If I could live anywhere... I would live in a cottage in the woods making tea.
My favorite car is... a modest one.
I think drugs are...not a way to escape reality.


Lemonade Day

There's nothing really to do today,
so bottoms up. Chug that lemonade. ♥  


Fill In The Blank

I would ask why there are spaces in between our fingers,
holes in our hearts,
sunken, lowly feelings,
when we are apart.
I would ask how you are doing, 
and know you'd do the same,
I know we'd lie to each other.
I know we'd play a silly game.
I would ask if you had to leave,
and know you would say no,
not out of arrogance,
but out of knowledge that
the place you've were always wanting to go
was with me.
You have me.


Bow Over My Heart

It seems as if the only photo that I'm confortable taking is when I'm not in it.



Greenery Close By Me

When we held hands,
stared into each other's eyes
not gaze down the path of the future
because looking forward would put us in the past
No retrospect, please. Mmm.
You're more beautiful than the stroll we took together,
ruby lips and mossy Earth
In all honesty, I can't remember
much else, it's all a blur
all I can think, sing, shout is your name
to the sky, like a wish
to come back to me (to come back to me)
oh, where did you go? Your heart is
cold, not in my hands anymore
Not on your sleeve either, the stitching has gone away,
to a colder place.
Alaska, where the sun rolls over the mountains,
the lush greenery buried underneath
the distantness. Please come back
to the Northwest.
And hold my hands,
let the waves crash,
in the summer.
Please rush to me, come back to me.
Love me again.


Je suis l'eau de l'ocean.

I feel as if this week has changed my outview on life. I'm sweeter and more forgiving, and it's hard to believe I'm smiling more.

One can only describe it as if...they were water. The water they have transformed into is deeper than the ocean, bluer than the eyes of a loved one. Colder, yet revitalizing to the touch. New.

Je suis l'eau de l'ocean.


Seattle Days

A day spent in Seattle is of joy! (especially with beautiful people like Tati!)


May I Please Be a Total Girl?

I've been thinking lately on how to resolve the conflict within my heart between me and this guy. It's been years of my tyrannous hope over common knowledge. I would not call hope tyrannous at all if it were not nessasary.

I've written letters to this boy in which I exclaim my passion and anger towards the apathy he only wants to give me. I've got heart break and tears in those pages that will never be known because I will never send it. If apathy is the condition he is in, then I can't very well change it much. Or, maybe I could. But the question I posed to myself while writing is if I would even want to.

I know in my mind that I am not confused, that I should let go of the hope I hold for this boy. But as I write pen to paper, I find that my words are jumbled in a dismissive crossword puzzle in which does not care for me, although must be solved.

The disregard for me is what I am feeling, and have been feeling for a very long time. And I've tried to fix this so many times, but I find myself without a shred of dignity for myself. You're never to change, and I hope one day you will make another happy. But not me.

Because I see the happiness you have with others and not with me.

Who am I even talking to now? To the readers or to you, you hurtful boy?

Oh, I wish I knew.


Nature's Illustration

I am happy.


Summer Lovin', Had Me a Blast

It doesn't always rain in Washington. <3


Why is it that the beautiful moon is ever so tampered with,

does elegance mean nothing to the common man?
Does beauty, devotedness, and pure white light not cross one's mind when the phases change from day to day, east to west, side to side to suit the man's kind? Moon phases are pressures that must be endured to live in this universe that we seem to have created. Does the moon have a choice, do we let it rest?
Of couse, when there is no moon at all. The Earth seems betrayed, but never has the moon left. Have faith that the moon is there! In the shadows of the earth, what does the moon do? Where is the moon when will we read storybooks under this ill-waiting sky? Crying for what has happened. What has gone wrong?
Oh, but does the moon come back to us well. Never does the perpetual moon cease to live. Our sweet delicate, bleu cheese moon. Oh, what works you do for us!

Does responcibility of the tides hold on anyone's shoulder other than the gracious moon, conforming to one's needs? Our beaches animals live through the tide that bring its world up and down. Where would sea salt crystallize other than uncovered rocks in the Pacific Sea. Oh, the tide goes, and then comes back to me, seafoam and periwinkle green. Moon! Hear my cry, grant my wish tonight. Salt without flavor, not something that I would want to be. Sea salt must crystallize by the sea. Moon, how much you have done for me...Under these stars, they are not complete, under these stars they bow to your seat. Moon! Hear me tonight. Thank you...
Caked with powder bleu, my dear moon, a thank you note is sent in the shape of a rocket ship. Little men are sent with a message from me to you, I really do hope it gets through. Petite white suits come to see you, my message is taped behing their helmet tops. But, in the case that you do not see, let me give it to thee:

"Moon, oh moon, your graciousness is the tranquility of my 3AM encounters with the night. Here is a kiss from me to you, from an earthling to the venusian moon. ♥ "

- me